The Five Foundational Building Blocks of New Relationships

Every tool has a collection of basic skills or concepts that drive its use. Utilizing personality styles and personality types in everyday bad reactions is no different. Researchers over the years (thousands of them) have found that by understanding soul nurturing someone’s personality type, you can learn much about that person. However, in order to successfully put this understanding into practice, you have to start with (and remember) the basic building blocks.

Over the years, there have been a variety of descriptors for personality types. Many of these descriptors were, at best, difficult to remember and, at worst, held negative connotations. In recent years, companies such as Insight Learning, Four Listings, and True Colors have tried to make the task of rendering easier by using four common colors (Blue, Green, Gold, and Orange) as the handholds for creating connections between personality characteristics and our common language. Those connections are crucial if we are to put theory into practice.

In this particular framework of understanding lie the building blocks — the concepts that form the basis. Without these basics, the understanding that we strive for will never be fully acquired.

Building block #1: Everyone is Unique

Every person you meet has some characteristics of each personality. The unique combination of inspirations and behaviors demonstrated by anybody make up their personality selection range. Most people have one color that is more like them than the other three. However, some people have points distributed equally among two, three, or even all four of the colors. Because of the nearly limitless variations, a person’s color selection range (and personality) is a very unique thing.

Building block #2: Celebrate Differences

Differences are among the first things that we notice about the people we meet. It is easy to join in a quick comparison of characteristics. Often, it is even better to make judgments or, at the very least, wish these folks were more like us. In reality, each personality has a set of values and standards. These differ so dramatically that comparing them is much like the old saying about oatmeal and oranges. It’s simply impossible to compare.

Building block #3: Rely on Strengths

Have you ever wanted, just for a second, to be like someone else? Have you wanted to experience a skill or ability that seemed to come easily to another? In that moment, you recognized and valued a strength that was not your own. Each personality type holds a collection of natural strengths that the other kind do not. In order to work and live in the most efficient way possible, we must rely on, and place more value on in both word and deed, the strengths of others. In turn, we need to commence to observe that others depend on our strengths as well.

Building block #4: Sometimes Less is More

People with keeping a positive self-image know how to make the most of their strengths. However, when put in a stressful position, even the most positive person can begin to feel out-of-esteem. When this happens, features normally considered as strengths can become grossly magnified or abandoned altogether. In times of stress, it is important to remember that any behavior (even keeping a positive one) taken to extreme can become a liability.

Building block #5: Don’t Judge a Book by Its Cover

In what some might consider a perfect world, we might all be motivated to behave in a manner in keeping with the preferences of our own personality type. In the real world however, this simply isn’t practical. Sometimes we will need to act in a way that seems at possibilities with personality. Circumstances at work, church, home, or school may necessitate us to look at characteristics of a personality not our own.

Studying to do other colors is part of our growth process. It helps us stretch our abilities and be accepted as more adept at handling any situation we come across. While considering this stretches exercise, balance becomes the operative word. Be sure the goal is to do another colorrather than to become another color. Folding and stretches are productive; breaking is not.

These are the five basic building blocks. They need to be positioned at the foundation of the relationships we making the effort to build. In understanding these, and building upon them, we commence to find no use for descriptors like bad and the good or right and wrong. These are replaced by nonjudgmental descriptions as understanding begins to come into focus, and our relationships start to sizzle.

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